Last month, I received a message on LinkedIn that sparked a familiar and necessary conversation. It was about balance. You know, that elusive state we’re all supposed to be striving for, especially as leaders.
Interestingly enough, I had just had a candid talk with one of my colleagues about this very topic. We came to the same conclusion: balance, much like happiness, is elusive. And ironically, the pursuit of it is what keeps so many of us from actually experiencing the fulfillment we’re looking for.
Really think about it. The more we chase balance, success, or happiness, the more it seems to slip out of reach. We add more strategies, more time blocks, more commitments to our already packed calendars, thinking we’re getting closer to some ideal version of leadership. But instead of feeling aligned or empowered, we end up drained, disconnected, and often, quietly overwhelmed.
My response to the LinkedIn question:
In response to the LinkedIn message, I answered honestly. And when the next question came, “So how do you create balance?” I found myself intuitively knowing my answer, but what do others think, and is this something that people are searching for? So, I did what many of us do: I Googled it.
I searched: “How do I have balance in life?”
Twenty-eight pages in, I stopped clicking. Not because I ran out of answers, but because none of the answers were actually helping. They were feeding the same loop of over-functioning and under-replenishing. Here’s a snapshot of what I found:
- The Center for Motivation and Change: “Living a balanced life is simply being able to find the inner resources we need to get back up to try to find and keep our balance.”
→ So I need more energy to search for more energy?
- Yoga U Online: “A balanced life requires self-discipline. You have to divvy up your time so you aren’t neglecting family, friends, or self.”
→ But what about joy? Restoration? Time to just be?
- Intermountain Healthcare: “Put ‘you’ on your schedule first, then schedule life’s chores afterward.”
→ A great idea in theory, but how often do we actually do that, especially as leaders?
At The Amplified Life Company, we coach leaders to stop chasing balance and start living with intention. I shared three core principles that I return to again and again, both personally and in my work with teams:
1. Let Go of the Myth of Balance
Balance is not just hard; it’s unachievable. And believing we should be able to “do it all” creates guilt, comparison, and eventual burnout. Instead, aim for integration, which is a daily practice of aligning your time, energy, and presence with what matters most. It’s not perfect, and it won’t be evenly distributed. But it’s real. It’s sustainable.
Balance is not just hard; it’s unachievable. And believing we should be able to “do it all” creates guilt, comparison, and eventual burnout. Instead, aim for integration, which is a daily practice of aligning your time, energy, and presence with what matters most. It’s not perfect, and it won’t be evenly distributed. But it’s real. It’s sustainable.
2. Honor Your Season
This is a leadership mindset shift. Every leader, every team, every organization has seasons. What does this season require of you? What does it release you from? Stop dragging expectations from last quarter, or next year, into today’s decisions. When you name the season you’re in, your choices become clearer, your meetings become more focused, and your team feels more aligned.
This is a leadership mindset shift. Every leader, every team, every organization has seasons. What does this season require of you? What does it release you from? Stop dragging expectations from last quarter, or next year, into today’s decisions. When you name the season you’re in, your choices become clearer, your meetings become more focused, and your team feels more aligned.
3. Live from Your Best Self, Daily
Define who you are at your highest and reverse engineer your routines to support that version of you. For teams, this means clarifying roles, simplifying priorities, and focusing on what actually moves the needle. Ask: what are the 20 percent of activities that generate 80 percent of our impact and energy? And then ruthlessly protect time for those.
Define who you are at your highest and reverse engineer your routines to support that version of you. For teams, this means clarifying roles, simplifying priorities, and focusing on what actually moves the needle. Ask: what are the 20 percent of activities that generate 80 percent of our impact and energy? And then ruthlessly protect time for those.
As a leader, your energy sets the tone for your team. When you’re constantly chasing balance, your team feels it. When you move with intention, clarity, and grace, they follow suit. And when you stop overcommitting and start choosing alignment, you create permission for your people to do the same.
Let’s be honest: moving from balance to integration may feel like a loss at first. We’ve been conditioned to measure our worth by our capacity to juggle. But real leadership is not about managing everything. It’s about discerning what truly matters and leading from that place, consistently.
That shift starts with you.
So, here’s the question I leave you with:
What would change if you stopped chasing balance and started building a leadership life rooted in clarity, presence, and purpose?
For me?
It feels like freedom.
It feels like alignment.
It feels like energy that replenishes instead of depletes.
It feels like leading from my best and inviting others to do the same.
It feels like freedom.
It feels like alignment.
It feels like energy that replenishes instead of depletes.
It feels like leading from my best and inviting others to do the same.
Are you ready to let go of balance and lead from a place of meaningful integration?
Curious what this could look like for your team or leadership journey? Message me on LinkedIn or visit carmenohling.com to learn more about how we help leaders and teams integrate what matters most.