Earlier this month I received this text message from one of my first mentors, Lori Harder: 

“Get in the rooms where your dreams are other people’s realities.”

I started searching back in my text messages for other messages from Lori about getting in the room, and here’s another mic drop moment that I found:

“You can only go as far as you’re willing to grow.  If you can’t seem to get unstuck, notice that you are likely holding back from putting yourself in situations, networks, rooms, and opportunities that would make you uncomfortable.  The bigger the discomfort, the bigger the opportunities!!”

These messages sparked a level of joy inside thinking about when I was just three years into my personal and professional growth journey.  I signed up for an online coaching program with Lori that was called, The Bliss Habit. It was a 12-week online program that consisted of weekly dripped content of a meditation, workbook, and video.  I remember anxiously waiting for the email each week and being so encouraged to dive into the work.  Week one was all about authenticity and had me asking inquiry questions like, who am I, what do I love, what do I want?  I remember feeling challenged by this, and it was only week number one!

Interestingly enough, I often ask my coaching clients, “What do you want” and it’s a challenge for them to give a clear, concise, authentic, and aligned answer. Try it – without any context ask yourself, “What do I want?”  Then stop and wait to see what comes through first.  Does it surprise you?  Do you immediately go to thinking about something else that you “think you should want” instead?

Back to the Bliss Habit experience, by about week seven of the twelve-week journey, I found myself allowing life to get in the way of my initial excitement and devotion to my growth.   I was still doing the work, but I realized that I was as focused and committed.  So I decided to set a goal for a reward once I completed the course, including listening to the meditations multiple times during each week. This was the absolute best decision I have ever made because the reward was to attend Lori’s upcoming event, The Bliss Project in beautiful sunny California in March of 2017. 

I was getting into the room!!!!  The best part, and most uncomfortable part is that I was doing it ALONE.  I proceeded to complete the course and set these four intentions for the event:

1. Give.  When needed, serve.  
2. Sit in the front.  (Now I am 100% a front seater, but here I was front-ish)
3. Raise your hand at least once to ask a question or volunteer.
4. Make 2 new, meaningful connections.  (You must BE THE ONE, friends!)

Saying yes to this room and saying yes to getting uncomfortable at The Bliss Project was the catalyst for my self-belief, growth, drive, and success. 

Today, I am obsessed with in-person events, both attending and hosting.  Over the years, I have had the privilege of gifting many, many live event tickets to those who would not have otherwise attended an in-person event.  And, let me tell you my heart is so full thinking about their transformations!!  

Below are pictures of a couple of the amazing humans that were recipients of gifted tickets, and kind words that one of the amazing individuals wrote to me afterwards:

“Carmen, It has been a blessing getting to know you. Ever since I won the giveaway I have been able to experience your love, your kindness and your generosity. The conference, the speakers and attendees and all amazing and a beautiful example to me. I am in awe of what I experienced this weekend. Thank you for giving me the privilege of attending. Coming has changed my life and my vision you have changed my soul. You taught me new ways of giving and receiving love, THANK YOU!!!” – Magdalena

Reflecting on where we are today with The Amplified Life Company, our mission was born out of the type of transformation and connection that can only be experienced at an in-person event, which is this: 

To significantly improve the lives of over 1 million leaders by amplifying their gifts, voices, lives, and businesses through high-level collaboration, personal growth, and learning.

It is also why one of our core beliefs is:

Your network is your net worth, and it begins where your skillset ends and is the catalyst to your next level.  

Which was also highly influenced by Lori Harder, all because I got myself in that room!  Are you ready to get in the room during the second half of 2014?   I have put together a list of my top recommendations you can download HERE, which includes our signature event, The Amplified Life World Conference– the only live event where you can achieve significant results in less than one year!

Now you’re probably having a hard time picking which one!  I have recorded two podcasts for you about in-person events, listen to help you decide.  

How to make the most out of in-person events

My own personal experience and recap of 3 in-person events

If you still have more questions or want to chat, please feel free to reach out to us at hello@carmenohling.com

I hope to see you in multiple rooms during the second half of 2024! 

For more tips and resources on BEING THE ONE, follow us, The Amplified Life Company @carmenohling

The vision and purpose at The Amplified Life Company:

“Be the one to show the world how truly great life can be!”

The mission at The Amplified Life Company:

To significantly improve the lives of over 1 million leaders by amplifying their gifts, voices, lives, and businesses through high-level collaboration, personal growth, and learning.

I am writing a book.

Well, technically, last year, I wrote a rough draft of a book.

I committed to the priority of writing this year in a substantial way, multiple times a week, in order to produce another manuscript, a book proposal and sign with a book agent.

I just did our mid-year review, both personally and as a company.

Can you guess how much progress I have made towards the new manuscript?

Zero.

You read that right, zero.

I do have to give myself a small amount of credit because I have written some pretty compelling newsletters this year both to you, our community and posted on LinkedIn.

This work is not wasted, it’s quality and impactful for the readers and practice for me…

….but, that does not substantially get me closer to my goal.

Have you reflected on your 2024 priorities and goals yet?  If not, now is the time!

You see, this lack of perceived progress could be discouraging, in fact, many times in the past, not achieving the outcome I set out to achieve would have been extremely discouraging, and in fact I may have even counted myself out completely from continuing. 

This year is different.  My mindset is different.  I see through a lens of expansion vs limitation and know that these results are only information.  This information is what I can use as fuel to make a different decision, take action, and build a sense of enthusiasm for the dream.  They mean nothing about my worth or ability, and I hold no judgement.

Maybe you’re in my boat, too.  If so, here’s what I am doing to move forward:

Instead of asking what I did wrong, I asked what did I learn?  I learned that I do very well with discipline, planning, organization, and accountability.  When I go through times of my plate being full, I am not giving 100% to these 4 pillars of success.  Why?  Because they take time; they take building in the whitespace to think, reflect, and plan.  My ego self likes to be a “do-er” and it’s very easy for me to start “doing” but often it’s not on the things that really matter, the things that will really move the needle.

I am learning that when I do these two things weekly and daily, I can strongly uphold these pillars:

1. Sunday planning session for the week ahead.  This means planning out my calendar, my workouts, doing some meal prep, working with Joal to sync up our weeks, delegating, and planning my 20% that I will do in each daily work session.
2. No matter what, each day I complete my task that is part of my 20% (the 20% is the important needle-moving tasks that only I can do), write out 3 WINS at the end of each day, 3 things I am grateful for, and something that I learned.  This ensures that I have momentum towards my priorities and I stay high vibe, aligned and in a growth mindset.
3. I communicate my goals to others (to help hold me accountable) and I also communicate my fears and doubts that come up during the week so that I can quickly get back into alignment and in action.

The next thing that I am doing is weekly tracking, with a new tracking sheet for my KPIs (key performance indicators) for both our company and my personal goals.

Instead of waiting until the end of the quarter or month, we are reviewing this weekly, all through the lens of these two things:

1. What can we celebrate this week?
2. What did we learn this week?
3. Who do we need to help?
4. How did I serve that I am the most proud of?
5. What one focus for the upcoming week will make the biggest impact?

So here we are now into the second week of July and I am writing again in a substantial way.  Writing that sentence brought a huge smile to my face.  I hope that you can review your 2024 progress to reflect, adjust, and take action as well.

Before you know it, we’ll be smiling together.  (Please do send a pic and tag me @carmenohling)

Here’s to an abundance of success and learning in 2024,

Carmen

Society talks a lot about this idea of work-life balance.  To me, there is no such thing as balance, but there is integration.  Integration of your deepest priorities in this season of your life.  Ensuring you have vision, clarity, and focus on these priorities, and take the steps necessary each day to fulfill them. 

In both our workplace training, and 1-1 coaching we teach this and it’s a game-changer for so many individuals and teams.  

Two specific results we’ve seen are:

1.   Dreaming a new dream that’s not limited to what everyone around you is doing and then going all in. Renting out their home and traveling the world doing work they love as a family. Learning, growing, and exploring together.
2.   Developing team communication “agreements” that greatly reduced distractions, misunderstandings, and misguided urgency that is not an urgent matter.  Leaving the team feeling less overwhelmed, feeling more supported, and doubling their productivity.

One great example of work-life integration comes from Netflix co-founder Mark Randolph, and he writes:

I’ve worked hard, for my entire career, to keep my life balanced with my job. In my book, I write about my Tuesday date nights with my wife. For over thirty years, I had a hard cut-off on Tuesdays. Rain or shine, I left at exactly 5 pm and spent the evening with my best friend. We would go to a movie, have dinner, or just go window-shopping downtown together.

Nothing got in the way of that. No meeting, no conference call, no last-minute question or request. If you had something to say to me on Tuesday afternoon at 4:55, you had better say it on the way to the parking lot. If there is a crisis, we are going to wrap it up by 5:00.

Those Tuesday nights kept me sane. And they put the rest of my work in perspective.

I resolved a long time ago to not be one of those entrepreneurs on their 7th startup and their 7th wife. In fact, the thing I’m most proud of in my life is not the companies I started, it’s the fact that I was able to start them while staying married to the same woman; having my kids grow up knowing me and (best as I can tell) liking me, and being able to spend time pursuing the other passions in my life.

That’s my definition of success.

It seems to me that Mark is clear on his priorities: self, wife, family, work – in that order.  I am sure that the integration of these 4 things ebb and flow over the years but I am 100% obsessed with the fact that the Tuesday nights with his wife never wavered, nor did the time with his kids, or the time he takes for himself.

What is your work-life integration like?  Email me at carmen@carmenohling.com and let me know!

Here’s to designing and living lives we love,

Carmen

I read this on LinkedIn recently…

I am not sharing this because I think it’s the “right” way to define success for everyone.  I am sharing this to show the importance of designing a life you truly love and measuring your success on your own terms.

For years I made the same mistake I see so many people making, following someone else’s definition of success instead of taking the time to discern one for themselves. You see, when you are following someone else’s definition of success you will never be truly fulfilled – you will always be seeking something more.  In our coaching company, we like to coin this as, “An all-consuming-yet-never-satisfied” search for more.  Leaving you feeling less than, stressed, overworked, and resentful.

But on the flip side, more can be found when you turn the mirror on yourself and define what matters most to you, then each day unreasonably go after it without regard to external environmental pressures. 

Today, I encourage you to sit down one afternoon and create the space to decide what success looks and feels like for you.

It could be a career aspiration.

It could be way more time and presence with your family.

It could be navigating your health to optimize your energy.

It could be feeling deeply connected to God and your sense of purpose. 

Have fun with it and remember this key point– there’s no wrong answer when it comes to defining your success.

You get to choose. 

I’d love to hear what you come up with, shoot me a message and share! 

Stopping on my walk this morning in beautiful, sunny Miami Beach, I picked up a shiny copper penny. It was head-side down, so I flipped it over to view the year: 2016.

Do you stop to pick up lucky pennies? What if it’s a dime, or maybe a quarter? Or do you simply walk by without a second thought? After reading this, you’ll stop every time…

As I looked at the shiny penny in my hand, I thought back to my life in 2016. Here are a few highlights from that year as I look back:

{Tip: Look back in your journal and the photos on your phone to get your memory going.}

• Two years previously, I left my successful corporate career with JPMorgan to start my coaching company. Our intention and mission in the early years were to guide others to nourish their bodies with real food and optimize their energy and mindsets.
• Our daughter graduated from 8th grade in June and entered her freshman year of high school in the fall of 2016.
• We visited our son, who was attending Northwestern University in Evanston, IL. By the way, he graduated from there two years later with a biomedical engineering degree.
• I was very passionate about training and building my physical physique during this time, too. I competed in three bodybuilding competitions that year: one in Denver, one in Washington State, and one in LA. My highest placing that year was second. I’ve always wanted to earn an overall placing… thinking it’s never too late. What do you think?
• My bestie and I went on one of our first bestie trips (out of state) and found a “bike freeway” and a restaurant with the best ice for their drinks. Really, the ice does matter and can make or break a drink!
• I struggled with family stuff and feeling disconnected from Joal at times this year because of challenges in our lives.
• I also organized another girlfriend trip to Scottsdale that year, the first of many. Know that if you want something like that to happen, you’ll most likely have to BE THE ONE to make it happen!
• Joal and I did our annual trip to Las Vegas, but this time to celebrate our niece’s 21st birthday. They won big on craps and me on roulette.
• I spoke at the Amazing You Women’s Conference about putting yourself first and taking care of your mind, body, and spirit.
• I read the book, A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson, and it changed my life. This was my first introduction to A Course In Miracles. IYKYK.
• I fully stepped into taking personal responsibility for my life, my results, my thoughts, my emotions…. For it all. You know that moment when you think, “Oh sh*t, maybe it’s me?!”
• Our family dog, Knala, was officially my-ride-or-die in 2016. I still miss her every day.
• I struggled with under-eating and over-eating after dieting for over a year for bodybuilding competitions. This took a pretty big hit on my confidence too.
• My journaling practice was key to overcoming many of my challenges this year and became a staple in my life to this day.
• I attended two in-person events alone, with the intention to make new, meaningful connections and push myself into uncomfortable situations for growth.

Today was a pretty cool day of reflection, all because of a lucky penny I found on the ground during my morning God walk. Thinking back to 2016, I feel so blessed today. I never dreamed that my life, health, relationship, and business would be at the level they are today.

I did a poll in our community this week around what we complain about most. The top things were: work colleagues, not enough time, stress and overwhelm, family members, and not enough money. It made me think of a quote I heard at an event by Jasmine Star: “The things you are complaining about today are the things that you once prayed for.” LET THAT SINK IN.

Each day, life is ready to present us with blessings and miracles; we simply must be open to receive them. So, next time you see that penny on the ground, I hope you pick it up. I hope it causes you to reflect. I hope that it brings you to a place of deep appreciation and gratitude for your life. I hope it inspires you to keep going.

Sending you love and high vibes!

I am sitting outside just after 1 pm in the afternoon on a Monday in Miami Beach.  The afternoon is humid and hot, but I am in the shade and there’s a breeze, so I am enjoying the time outside today.  As I sit I am reading and come across this statement from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, and it prompted me to write.  Here’s the affirmation:

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”

I could feel this deep in my heart and a full-body agreement with this affirmation, and then I said this next profound statement out loud to myself:

“And as soon as you believe in yourself, you’ll know the next step to take.”

Whew!  Take a few deep breaths and repeat these statements to yourself.

What do you feel?

What thoughts come up for you?

I think a lot about making sure you can feel my heart through my writing.

You know the solution I always come back to?

Trusting myself.
Believing in myself.
Trusting and knowing, believing, and writing from a place of authenticity and creativity.

What if our big leadership decisions and small daily life choices were this simple?

1. People can be guides, inspiration, or motivation for you but if you try to do it exactly like they do it you will always fall short.  You will fall short because you are measuring yourself against them, and they are not you.  Take what you learn and test it in your life, your way.  Making this small shift from “how you should do it” to “how you do it” builds trust and belief.

2. Stop second-guessing yourself.  Actually let me put that a better way: STOP SECOND GUESSING EVERYTHING.  Get it?  Ya, I see you!  How do you know I see you?  Because I was like you… Always second-guessing each of my decisions, triple-checking my work, and replaying scenarios in my head with a lens of criticism.  Ugg, it was exhausting and instead of building trust it built my “I am not good enough story” that replayed in my head.  Start small here.  Maybe you notice you’re second-guessing what you’re going to wear for the day, go back to the first decision.  Try doing this throughout the day, then collect evidence that your first choice was a great choice- and the self-trust and belief muscle builds!

3. Find a mirror and ask for feedback.  No, not a physical mirror but I am talking about someone who is just a little further ahead than you on where you want to go in this season of your life and leadership.  Ask them the below 3 questions, but when you do be ready- the feedback will be both a reflection of where you shine and where your reflection is a little dull.
a. When you think of me, what really stands out?  Where do I shine?
b. What’s the one thing you’d call me for over anyone else?
c. One of my biggest values is learning and growing.  In your opinion what area of my life and leadership would I benefit from learning and growing in next?  Why?

Repeat steps 1-3 daily and collect your evidence!

Collecting evidence means taking a pause to fully experience the moments when you feel self-trust or self-belief deeply.  Feel the feelings in your body and anchor them in with a few deep breaths.  If you’re considering skipping this part, don’t! Tying physical sensations to your experiences locks in the feeling and moment into your short-term memory.  You can then call on your short-term memory to bolster your trust and belief daily.  Again, the more you use it the more it will grow.

Lastly, I believe in you, isn’t it time you start?