What If Happiness Isn’t Something to Chase?

What If Happiness Isn’t Something to Chase?

by | Oct 23, 2025 | Uncategorized

Why redefining success might be the most strategic leadership move you’ll ever make.
 
I sat down on the tall brown stool on my balcony in Miami Beach, setting my journal, pen, coffee, and water gently on the table in front of me. I took a deep breath, felt my shoulders drop, and looked up. The early morning sun had just started illuminating the tops of the deep green palm trees. The ocean shimmered in the distance, calm and endless.
 
In that moment, no milestones reached for the day, no boxes checked on the to-do list, yet I felt fully alive.
Not because I had accomplished anything.
But because I had finally slowed down long enough to notice.
 
And I realized: This is happiness. Not the version we’re sold based on success, acquisition, or approval, but a state that’s always available, if we’re present enough to choose it.
How Do You Define Happiness?
 
At a recent keynote, Harvard professor and best-selling author Arthur Brooks (co-author of Build the Life You Want with Oprah) offered a deceptively simple formula for happiness:
 
“The happiest people have, in both balance and abundance, three things: enjoyment, satisfaction, and meaning.”
 
No mention of titles. No need for a net worth benchmark. No endless list of goals.
 
Brooks calls these the macronutrients of happiness, essential, non-negotiable, and nourishing for the long game of life and leadership:
  • Enjoyment is not just fleeting pleasure, but shared joy. Think laughter over a meal, meaningful conversation, or a team win celebrated together.
  • Satisfaction comes from effort and perseverance. It’s the reward of discipline and delayed gratification. But it’s also fleeting, unless we pause to acknowledge it.
  • Meaning is your internal compass. It’s the “why” behind your work and your life. The story you’re telling about who you are and what matters most.
Brooks also identifies four pillars of a meaningful life:

Faith. Family. Friendship. Work.


Faith doesn’t have to be religious; it can be trust in something bigger than yourself. Nature. Service. Purpose.
 
And then he dropped this truth bomb:

“Your life is your enterprise, and you are the founder and CEO. Love and happiness are your currency. Do you know how to accumulate more of them?”

For years, I was the high-functioning achiever. Maybe you are, too.

Chasing the next thing. Then the next. Then the next.

Each milestone moved the goalpost. Rest, play, or even celebration? It was all postponed because I hadn’t “earned it” yet. And every time I hit a goal, I raised the bar again, thinking this time the satisfaction would last.

But it never did.

It wasn’t until I slowed down, really slowed down, that I realized:

I had been bargaining with my happiness.

I believed I could buy it with productivity, perfection, or performance. But happiness isn’t a transaction. It’s a practice, simply because it’s always available.
A New Way to Measure Success (That Actually Creates It)
 

Today, I measure success differently.  By what I feel, and by what I help others feel.

  • Personally: Did I wake up feeling energized and enthusiastic for the day ahead?

     

  • Professionally: Am I doing meaningful work I love, with people who I enjoy and respect deeply, who are also lit up by what they do, and together, are we making a real impact in the lives of leaders?
If the answer is yes, I know we are building something special, sustainable, and significantly impactful.
 
This isn’t about rejecting ambition. It’s about redefining it.
 
Success, for me, now includes:
  • Solitude that restores
  • Discipline that focuses
  • Vision that inspires
  • Connection that energizes
  • Self-leadership that sustains
It’s building the internal landscape of a fulfilling life, one that you don’t have to escape from, numb out in, or earn back with hustle culture burnout.
If you’re a CEO, executive, founder, or changemaker, here’s the reality:
 
Your inner life drives your outer results.
 
The energy you bring into a room, your presence, your clarity, your groundedness.  That’s what sets the tone. Teams don’t just follow what you say. They mirror what you model.
 
That’s why the leaders we coach aren’t just refining strategy, they’re redefining identity.
Because leadership isn’t just about what you do.
It’s about who you’re becoming in the process.
If this resonates, here are 3 questions to reflect on this week:
  1. When do I feel most alive in my day? Can I create more space for that feeling?
  2. What am I chasing right now that’s costing me joy?
  3. How would I lead differently if I believed happiness was the path, not the reward?
Small, consistent shifts = Big results.
So I’ll leave you with the question I started with:
 
What if happiness isn’t something to chase?
What if it’s something you practice, moment by moment, breath by breath?
 
I’d love to hear what this sparked for you. Drop a comment below or email me directly at carmen@carmenohling.com
 
Let’s stop postponing peace.
Let’s build leadership legacies that feel as good on the inside as they look on paper.
Why JPMorgan’s Next CEO Must Be a Coach

Why JPMorgan’s Next CEO Must Be a Coach

by | Oct 16, 2025 | Uncategorized

I spent 16 years inside JPMorgan. I saw the culture Jamie Dimon built, and I met him a few times. One of those moments that stuck with me wasn’t a strategy session or a speech.
 
It was Jamie walking the floor in dad jeans and New Balance sneakers. No flash. No performance. Just a leader who was direct, visionary, no-BS, accountable, and, above all, an encourager.
 
That’s leadership.
 
And if you read his latest 2025 Shareholder Letter, you see why JPMorgan Chase is still at the top: he keeps hammering on the basics that most leaders ignore. Complacency, arrogance, bureaucracy, and BS kill companies. He says it outright. He pushes leaders to weed out bureaucracy every day, to run leaner, to listen harder, and to stay humble.
 
He told his executives, “It’s your job to coach. Don’t outsource it.”
 
That’s the truth most organizations miss. Titles don’t build culture. Coaching does. Not “rah rah” pep talks but the kind of coaching that holds people accountable, builds trust, and inspires vision.
 
JPMorgan Chase will need its next CEO to be that kind of leader.
 
And Dimon’s not just saying it in his letter. In his recent Fortune interview, he went further. He said the next CEO cannot simply be the “smartest in the room.” Instead, they need to be the pied piper.  Someone who can rally people forward, motivate through presence, and build a culture of trust from the inside out.
 
That’s how JPMorgan stays not just relevant, but dominant,  not just for the next five years, but for the next century.
 
How We Do This at The Amplified Life Co.
This is exactly the kind of leadership shift we help organizations make every day. We take the principles Jamie Dimon is pointing to, coach, motivator, visionary, and make them practical, embodied, and real for leaders and teams.
 
Here’s what we specifically do:
  • Vision Communication Training → Teach leaders to speak with clarity, conviction, and charisma so their vision lands with employees, boards, and stakeholders.
  • Thought Leadership Labs → Facilitate experiential sessions where leaders practice being bold, uncomfortable, and creative, not just logical.
  • Above-the-Line Coaching → Show executives how to coach their own teams with presence and purpose instead of outsourcing it.
  • Culture Activation Workshops → Transform company values from words on a wall into behaviors people live and breathe every day.
How We’ve Helped Before
We’ve seen firsthand how these shifts change organizations:
  • Helped a regional financial institution transform its board presentations from dry data dumps into visionary storytelling that earned trust and unity.
  • Worked with a city government leadership team to move from reactive, siloed communication to collaborative, community-centered leadership.
  • Partnered with a mission-driven nonprofit to teach executives how to embody their values on stage, leading to record fundraising and renewed staff engagement.
Who We Help Most
We specialize in leaders and organizations who are ready to be bold and elevate beyond “business as usual”:
  • Regional financial institutions that want to stay relevant, attract talent, and inspire their members.
  • City and state governments need leaders to speak with clarity and vision in high-pressure environments.
  • Mission-driven organizations that want to embody their values so clearly that others can’t help but rally behind them.
The Takeaway
What Jamie Dimon knows, and what most leaders are still waking up to,  is that the future belongs to coaches, not managers or in-the-moment performers. Leaders who build trust. Leaders who can speak a vision so clearly that people don’t just follow, they join.
 
That’s how JPMorgan Chase will write its next chapter.
And it’s how your organization can, too.
 
Your Next Move
If the next CEO of JPMorgan must be a coach to keep the #1 bank in the world at the top, what does that say about your own leadership?
The Fallacy of Balance in Leadership

The Fallacy of Balance in Leadership

by | Oct 9, 2025 | Uncategorized

Last month, I received a message on LinkedIn that sparked a familiar and necessary conversation. It was about balance.  You know, that elusive state we’re all supposed to be striving for, especially as leaders.
Interestingly enough, I had just had a candid talk with one of my colleagues about this very topic. We came to the same conclusion: balance, much like happiness, is elusive. And ironically, the pursuit of it is what keeps so many of us from actually experiencing the fulfillment we’re looking for.
 
Really think about it. The more we chase balance, success, or happiness, the more it seems to slip out of reach. We add more strategies, more time blocks, more commitments to our already packed calendars, thinking we’re getting closer to some ideal version of leadership. But instead of feeling aligned or empowered, we end up drained, disconnected, and often, quietly overwhelmed.
 
My response to the LinkedIn question:
In response to the LinkedIn message, I answered honestly. And when the next question came, “So how do you create balance?” I found myself intuitively knowing my answer, but what do others think, and is this something that people are searching for?  So, I did what many of us do: I Googled it.
 
I searched: “How do I have balance in life?”
 
Twenty-eight pages in, I stopped clicking. Not because I ran out of answers, but because none of the answers were actually helping. They were feeding the same loop of over-functioning and under-replenishing. Here’s a snapshot of what I found:

  • The Center for Motivation and Change: “Living a balanced life is simply being able to find the inner resources we need to get back up to try to find and keep our balance.”

→ So I need more energy to search for more energy?

 

  • Yoga U Online: “A balanced life requires self-discipline. You have to divvy up your time so you aren’t neglecting family, friends, or self.”

→ But what about joy? Restoration? Time to just be?

 

  • Intermountain Healthcare: “Put ‘you’ on your schedule first, then schedule life’s chores afterward.”
→ A great idea in theory, but how often do we actually do that, especially as leaders?
 
At The Amplified Life Company, we coach leaders to stop chasing balance and start living with intention. I shared three core principles that I return to again and again, both personally and in my work with teams:
 
1. Let Go of the Myth of Balance
Balance is not just hard; it’s unachievable. And believing we should be able to “do it all” creates guilt, comparison, and eventual burnout. Instead, aim for integration, which is a daily practice of aligning your time, energy, and presence with what matters most. It’s not perfect, and it won’t be evenly distributed. But it’s real. It’s sustainable.
 
2. Honor Your Season
This is a leadership mindset shift. Every leader, every team, every organization has seasons. What does this season require of you? What does it release you from? Stop dragging expectations from last quarter, or next year, into today’s decisions. When you name the season you’re in, your choices become clearer, your meetings become more focused, and your team feels more aligned.
 
3. Live from Your Best Self, Daily
Define who you are at your highest and reverse engineer your routines to support that version of you. For teams, this means clarifying roles, simplifying priorities, and focusing on what actually moves the needle. Ask: what are the 20 percent of activities that generate 80 percent of our impact and energy? And then ruthlessly protect time for those.
 
As a leader, your energy sets the tone for your team. When you’re constantly chasing balance, your team feels it. When you move with intention, clarity, and grace, they follow suit. And when you stop overcommitting and start choosing alignment, you create permission for your people to do the same.
 
Let’s be honest: moving from balance to integration may feel like a loss at first. We’ve been conditioned to measure our worth by our capacity to juggle. But real leadership is not about managing everything. It’s about discerning what truly matters and leading from that place, consistently.
 
That shift starts with you.
 
So, here’s the question I leave you with:
 
What would change if you stopped chasing balance and started building a leadership life rooted in clarity, presence, and purpose?
 
For me?
It feels like freedom.
It feels like alignment.
It feels like energy that replenishes instead of depletes.
It feels like leading from my best and inviting others to do the same.
 
Are you ready to let go of balance and lead from a place of meaningful integration?
 
Curious what this could look like for your team or leadership journey?  Message me on LinkedIn or visit carmenohling.com to learn more about how we help leaders and teams integrate what matters most.
What giving up coffee taught me about leadership (and the 80/20 rule)

What giving up coffee taught me about leadership (and the 80/20 rule)

by | Oct 2, 2025 | Uncategorized

September 15, 2025, marks the first day of a fast my husband and I are doing with our church, Transformation Church. Over the years, I’ve fasted from many things: sugar, alcohol, social media, and even TV.
 
This time, my husband smiled and said, “I think yours should be coffee.”
 
Instant resistance. I love my morning ritual. The warmth, the smell, the rhythm. I agreed, but inside I knew, I wasn’t convinced.
 
All weekend, the question lingered: Is coffee really what God is asking me to release?
 

If you’ve never prayed for direction, here’s what it feels like for me:


“God, I pray that you reveal to me the direction you have for me with fasting next week. I release control and allow you to guide me.”
 
And then you wait. Sometimes the answer comes as a whisper. Sometimes it comes as the same lesson repeating itself until you finally learn.
 
That’s what happened to me over the past two weeks. Everywhere I looked, I saw nudges about focus, potential, and execution.
 
And then it hit me:
  • I hadn’t chosen coffee because it was my true distraction.
  • I had chosen it because my husband suggested it.
  • It looked like alignment, but really, it was appeasement.
Here’s the guidance I received:
 
“You’ve built a structure that looks like alignment, but it’s actually distracting you. You’re still doing it your way, and it’s keeping you from what you truly want, and what I’ve called you to do.”
 
That stung. But it also freed me.
 
Instead of fasting from coffee, I’m fasting from false structures, the ones that make me feel productive but actually keep me from my 20%.
 
Here’s how it looks in practice:
  • Two daily deep work blocks focused only on the 20% of priorities that move the needle.
  • No phone until 11AM and starting every day with prayer, journaling, reading, meditation, and walking.
  • In-person meetings only on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
  • Ending each day no later than 4:30PM and shifting into what I have coined “vacation mode” for the remainder of the day, which includes rest, play, and presence.
The formula is simple:

Seeking < Solitude in Season + Structure = Synergy

 

And the leadership principle behind it is one I learned 27 years ago at JP Morgan Chase:

 

Twenty percent of your efforts drive eighty percent of your results.

Most leaders know this. Fewer live it.

 

That’s why they stay exhausted, busy in the 80% instead of impactful in the 20%.
 
But you don’t have to. You can fast from what’s distracting you, and finally lead in the 20%.
 
So here’s my question for you:

What one comfort, distraction, or false structure could you fast from this week so you can unlock your true 20%?
 
Share in the comments.  I want to know. 
What to Do When Tragedy Numbs You

What to Do When Tragedy Numbs You

by | Sep 25, 2025 | Uncategorized

How do you stay engaged, enthusiastic, and empowered when the world feels too heavy to hold?
 
Tragedy (noun): An event causing great suffering, destruction, or distress.
 
We’re not just seeing tragedy.
We’re swimming in it.
 
And if you’ve felt powerless lately, numb, overwhelmed, unsure how to respond, you’re not alone.
 
In the face of repeated heartbreak, the most human thing we can do is retreat. We protect our hearts. We focus inward. We survive. But when disconnection becomes our default, we lose something bigger than just our sense of safety; we lose our sense of purpose.
 
Over time, that numbness turns to apathy. And apathy doesn’t just rob us of empathy, it erodes our capacity for real leadership.
 
The good news? There is a different path.
 
My colleague Jason said something that hasn’t left me:
“We are at a crucial inflection point.”
 
And we are.
 
We can shrink, or we can choose to lead.
We can be the one who stays open.
The one who chooses presence over protection.
The one who leads with vision, even in uncertainty.
 
Here’s what helps me to anchor that choice:
 
4 Anchors for Vision-Led Leadership in a Disconnected World
 
1. Clarity – Choose your direction on purpose, even when the path isn’t clear. Lead with hope and conviction, not panic.
2. Curiosity – Stay open. Ask questions. Let go of being right. Commit to growth.
3. Compassion – Speak truth, even when it’s hard. Choose connection over comfort. Give, even when it’s inconvenient.
4. Consciousness – Practice reflection. Take personal responsibility. Create time for checking in with yourself through solitude, not isolation.
 
We may not be able to stop tragedy.
But we can stop letting it steal our presence.
 
When we live on purpose, out loud, we create ripples that become waves of change, compassion, and connection.
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